Things to Avoid When Supporting a Grieving Person


If someone close to you is going through a loss, it affects your wellbeing as well. It hurts to see that person suffer and you always thinking of ways to help them deal with the grief or to do something that lessens their pain. It can be very difficult time to articulate things and just your presence can have a calming effect and can support the person. You should avoid saying or doing things that will upset them further or aggravate their pain. You should be open, compassionate and willing to offer help if you wish to help out a grieving person. If you are struggling to show your solidarity, then you can get them keepsake jewellery like ashes into rings or lockets for ashes. Avoid saying and doing these things when you are around someone who has just lost a near and dear one. 

Don’t push them to get their life back to normal

There is not fixed time frame for mourning. If a person was very close or attached to the deceased, then they will naturally need a lot of time to get their lives back to normal. Even if they start going to work, it does not mean that they are ready to start socializing or going out again. If a person just wants to stay by themselves or stay indoors, respect their choices. You can show your love and support to them by gifting them jewellery made from ashes or by going to their place with a hot meal and spending time with them in an environment they feel comfortable in. 

Don’t be afraid to mention the deceased

Do not make talking about the deceased person a taboo or feel bad about bringing them up. In fact, talking about that person normalizes it and makes it easier to accept the loss. Also, most times, the thoughts of the grieving person will be filled by memories of the deceased. So, talking about them helps brings solace and facilitates the healing process. Ask about the things that they treasured doing together or share some pleasant memory you have of them. Encourage them to talk about the deceased person and memories and be all ears to what they have to say. 

Do not comment about their appearance

The grieving person will anyway be feeling quite lost and low at this time, so making comments like they look in a bad shape, or tired or depressed can have a damaging affect. Refrain from making complimentary remarks as well, as they might fear that they are being judged. Also, the grieving person may not feel up to it or might not have given consideration about how they are looking during this time, so pointing it out can hurt their self-confidence. If you know someone who is grieving the loss of a loved one, and you are struggling to of ways to show your solidarity, then gift them necklace for ashes from ashesurnsjewellery.com 

Do not tell them ways to cope

The last thing a grieving person wants is a lecture on what they should be doing to get on with their lives. Even though such advice comes from a good place, it can have an adverse effect and can make the person feel even worse. Do not tell them things that worked for you or someone you know. Also, do not try to push them towards religion and spiritualism as a means to cope with the loss. If your friend wants to know anything about your faith or your spiritual journey, then speak to them openly and candidly without ever imposing it upon them. The best thing is to hear them out and give them memorial jewellery to let them know that you are with them every step of the way. 

Also Read:- Tracing the History of Memorial Jewellery

Avoid platitudes

A platitude is a trite or meaningless statement, used as a thought-terminating cliché, aimed at putting the grieving person at ease. Things like “It is God’s will” or “they would hate to see you so upset” or “they are in a better place now” should never be part of any conversations with a bereaved person. These statements may be coming from a good place, but they can make the grieving person feel small and minimize their feelings. Giving them a warm hug, keepsake memorial jewellery, being a patient listener and a comforting presence in their life are more important than saying words that will automatically heal them.

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